Beatrice and I laugh.
‘I’m laughing,’ she says, ‘but we both know…’
‘What did he say?’
‘He said, “Anna. How goes? Sor–”.’
‘Oh for fuck’s sake,’ she cuts in. ‘”How goes?” Argh. You know anything the guy says is gonna make me angry.’
In contrast to how I felt when his message came through.
I was sitting at the kitchen table, trying not to look at my phone, hoping for a message from Tom (yes, that’s a legitimate activity for a Tuesday night). It didn’t occur to me that the message from an unknown number might be VP resurfacing. It even took me a moment to recognise his photo.
‘And I felt… nothing.’
‘That’s a really big thing,’ Beatrice says.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, think how far you’ve come. I mean, would you have reacted like that two months ago?’
‘I suppose not.’
I wouldn’t have contemplated not replying either.